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How to deal with non understanding family and friends

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Edited on 17/06/2016 at 00:15

So my family and some of my friends are not getting how ill i am, any ideas what to do about it? :)

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eloumol

18/04/2019 at 18:37

eloumol

Last activity on 06/04/2020 at 12:46

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6 comments posted | 5 in the Depression Forum

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Totally agree. However the facade she shows in church isnt the real her. If only they knew!! Its only me that doesnt get the "niceness".

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Elise

How to deal with non understanding family and friends https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/depression/living-with-behavioural-disorders-mental-illne/how-to-deal-with-non-understanding-family-and-999 2019-04-18 18:37:57

Pleasance

09/05/2019 at 10:32

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Pleasance

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@eloumol Hello,

your message really touched me, I could feel your sadness :( It would certainly not be better if you were gone, don't think like that and don't let anyone else make you feel that way.

Try and live your life without her, you aren't obliged to take her calls or listen to her, you can make your own life without her.

Why not reach out to your children in a calm manner to try and set things straight?

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Pleasance

martinrukin

10/06/2019 at 13:28

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martinrukin

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Some of my family understand or they. Try to others think nothing up with me mentally. They are not with me 24 hours a day some days I can be not bad then. It creeps IP on me and whamM.

Tigger.co.uk

27/06/2019 at 16:30

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Tigger.co.uk

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If you feel depressed and nobody wants to listen then I understand when you feel really down then get in touch with mind they are really supportive they can get you in touch with certain groups and they are very supportive of anyone suffering with any kind of mental illness also have a word with your doctors I have joined certain groups that help with this and I find when your able to talk to others they really listen so please dont think you are alone because there are also people on here that you can chat to if you need someone to listen then you are welcome to chat to me love and hugs tiggs

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JosephineO

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28/06/2019 at 14:09

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JosephineO

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@Tigger.co.uk @martinrukin @eloumol That is very good advice Tiggs, reaching out to others when you feel down is important. Carenity always has members willing to help and give support.

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eloumol

28/06/2019 at 15:13

eloumol

Last activity on 06/04/2020 at 12:46

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Yes thankyou so much for your kind words. I am feeling more hopeful at the moment. Had no contact from any of my family but I feel I'm adjusting to living without them. Horrible thing to have to say, I know. I am starting CBT next week too. 😁😁

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Elise

Tigger.co.uk

29/06/2019 at 11:23

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This is brilliant news keep up the good way I'm only to pleased to have helped life is for living enjoy your new start I really hope everything goes great for you in the future love and hugs tiggs xxxx

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eloumol

30/06/2019 at 11:08

eloumol

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Thankyou Tiggs, that means a lot. Have to keep trying eh!!

Elise xxx

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Elise

eloumol

30/06/2019 at 11:15

eloumol

Last activity on 06/04/2020 at 12:46

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Thankyou Tiggs, that means a lot. Have to keep trying eh!!

Elise xxx

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Elise

katz38

30/06/2019 at 20:36

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Hello I am really struggling as my family say that they understand that I am unwell and that I am not just a lazy unfit single mother but then I hear from friends that I am a waste of space as a mother and that my son needs a mother a million percent better than me. I am so tired of trying to get them to understand that it's not me just being lazy but that I try my best for my son and I know that I fail him. But I love him with all my heart and I just wish that they would try to be more understanding and not just make me feel like a piece of dirt that they are stood in. I am still cutting to try and sometimes it is like I have to be punished for being such a failure and a stupid useless mother. I have had to have stitches recently and my doctor has increased my medication and she says that it will take a few weeks for me to get used to it,but all it has done is make me tired land sluggish. My second youngest sister had a baby girl 3 weeks ago and as we have not spoken with her in nearly 9 years even though she lives 10 minutes from me. I have let my son spend time with my nieces at my parent's or my brother will bring him over to spend time with them. They are very close but sister will not speak to me or let me have anything to do with my nieces unless it is at my parent's house.

I can't remember what we fought about but I have not even seen my new niece. I have tried to apologise for my part in the fight land have begged her to forgive me but to no avail. I missed her twins communion this year as I was not invited but my son was. Even at Christmas I buy my nieces presents and she will buy for my son. I also buy her and her boyfriend presents from both me and my son. But she doesn't get me anything from her or the girls and she buys for the rest of the family. I am the oldest of six and it really hurts as over the years I have apologized loads of times even saying that it was all my fault and that I am so so sorry and I would do anything for her to forgive me. But she just won't speak to me. We were so close but I just don't have the energy to keep trying to get her to forgive me, as I feel like I am banging my head against a wall and getting nowhere just more pain .

And then I just feel so low and the anxiety gets sinning worse and then I don't leave the house unless I have to take my son somewhere. At the moment my son is at his part time job and is staying at his grandparents house for the night, so I home alone, and I really want to cut to make all these feelings go away. And not just be an embarrassment to my son and my family and I wish I could be the mother my son deserves and the daughter that is good enough for my family and not the fat useless waste of space that I am.

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