Black dog on my shoulder

Volunteering really does help. I'm part of Mountain Rescue and my fellow volunteers are currently supporting me through a time when I don't feel that I deserve the oxygen I inhale. My family have proven to be useless and selfish, I'm not brave enough to spoil my relationship with friends but the people I work with are holding me upright. 

Well done VickTaz on volunteering . It can only be a positive thing which can only help you to gain back you confidence thus proving that you have every right to inhale oxygen; which everyone does. 

I don't know your family but perhaps they struggle to understand what is happening in your life or they feel frustrated that they can't help you?? 

You will get through this episode and please God it makes you stronger.

As you will probably be aware doing something that releases the "happy hormones" can only improve your state of mind. It is good to know that you have the support of the team ; always be honest and open in order to get the best support for "you' I don't think that you should feel like you have to be "brave enough' to perhaps address your situation with your friends; real friends will support you. It could perhaps help you to build up your confidence, knowing that you no longer have to shy away from how you are really feeling.

Communication is a wonderful medicine if used properly.

Take care. x

Thank you. I'm now trying therapy to address my thoughts but I'm aware that I've had this for 21 years and each episode has passed in its own time. Currently ticking off one thing I've been putting off (i.e. putting the bins out) and one thing I enjoy (i.e. buying a walking magazine) each day. One thing I've learnt to be careful of is starting to feel better and then withdrawing from all help. 

Good afternoon Vickytaz. I do hope that you are having a good day. You have got the right attitude to see you through this stage . Please stick with the positive approach and not to withdraw from all help. I wish you all the very best in your recovery. Take Care.

Depression 3rd time yay not lol. This time it is very mean I named it Dave, I dont like Dave (That name i choice at random no offence too any daves) lol  

Meds at the mo i want CBT but ermmm thats not going to happen i am too well, whatever htat means