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Retired and depressed
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robjmckinney
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robjmckinney
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Last activity on 22/12/2024 at 18:04
Joined in 2015
606 comments posted | 19 in the Depression Forum
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While retirement for me has been quite a ride dealing with other family members and issues, so never had time to rest. We have today a great new world to explore online which was never really existed before. I am not a member of Facebook or any social media but discover so many groups operate online that are very accessable. For me I took over caring for our grandchild, finding no help anywhere, until I used my wife's account to explore groups, Bingo, there was several excellent groups. So whatever your interest in life there will be groups online of like minded people. These groups are quite good of ensuring your identity so you don't get any 'strange individuals' in your chosen group. Like you say you have all sorts of charity work to explore, my brother's widow volunteers to help out at the old peoples home her mother enjoyed her last days. Holiday options for our age group for singles as well as couples.
I have a static in Norfolk that we could stay March until November at a relatively low price which has been a fantastic haven in the summer. Being a little old fashioned it does not have large groups of children, mainly like minded people like ourselves, so a great social life if you want it. Some older people do the opposite in winter seasons and stay abroad, out of season for pennies with like minded people. Sadly for us we are back to school holidays due to our 9 year old grandchild so greatly restricted, thrust into being a parent again is quite a lesson in life.
Family is you greatest asset as we get older we need their support and safeguarding covering our backs. So the 'world is your oyster' but you have to put yourself out there, it won't come to you. Get out there and embrace it, it can be great fun, good luck!
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robjmckinney
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whitecross1955
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whitecross1955
Last activity on 06/11/2024 at 20:25
Joined in 2016
169 comments posted | 23 in the Depression Forum
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Retirement opened up a whole new world for me , If your health is good why not volunteer for a charity ? become involved in social justice ? a past time, gardening, music, join or form a group for older people and meet up ? If your physical health is not good then some charities need online help, or do some research into your family history ,trace distant relations across the world ,research local history where you live or where you were born. It all depends on your physical and mental health . Just some random thoughts I do work each day for a couple of hours at home and for my daughter who lives beside me ,We live in a rural area thankfully and I have couple of acres and have sown many trees to preserve and encourage wildlife, And will be there long after I leave this life.
Polina.K
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Polina.K
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Last activity on 11/08/2023 at 12:02
Joined in 2023
89 comments posted | 23 in the Depression Forum
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Hello @maury58! How are you feeling today?
Thank you for starting this discussion I think it is a very interesting topic we can discuss! I definitely understand where you are coming from and why you feel the way that you do. Nevertheless, I do encourage you to try and look from a different angle. @whitecross1955's comment is a great example of a positive outlook on the retirement situation. I will tag some members who might want to share their thoughts.
@Arn_UK @lordvee @robjmckinney @lesmal @mr chipps @Tigger.co.uk @Marv61 @NannieAnn @Pippadog @BrianM @annafielding @richard0804 @mjteddy @Sonicbear @Yank34 @mikebpool @lacemaker @Mrs E Larkin @sophiesmum @depressedgirl
Hello everyone! How are you doing today?
Are you retired? How does it make you feel? Do you think your life became better or worse after getting retired? What do you like to do in your free time?
Take care,
Polina from the Carenity team
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lacemaker
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lacemaker
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Last activity on 14/10/2024 at 22:02
Joined in 2015
87 comments posted | 2 in the Depression Forum
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@Polina.K
retirement seems to be very busy. I babysit my grandmonsters for two full days every fortnight, staying overnight and doing school runs and activities and cooking now. I play a lot of golf as walking is good for my lymphoedema.
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robjmckinney
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robjmckinney
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Last activity on 22/12/2024 at 18:04
Joined in 2015
606 comments posted | 19 in the Depression Forum
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While retirement for me has been quite a ride dealing with other family members and issues, so never had time to rest. We have today a great new world to explore online which was never really existed before. I am not a member of Facebook or any social media but discover so many groups operate online that are very accessable. For me I took over caring for our grandchild, finding no help anywhere, until I used my wife's account to explore groups, Bingo, there was several excellent groups. So whatever your interest in life there will be groups online of like minded people. These groups are quite good of ensuring your identity so you don't get any 'strange individuals' in your chosen group. Like you say you have all sorts of charity work to explore, my brother's widow volunteers to help out at the old peoples home her mother enjoyed her last days. Holiday options for our age group for singles as well as couples.
I have a static in Norfolk that we could stay March until November at a relatively low price which has been a fantastic haven in the summer. Being a little old fashioned it does not have large groups of children, mainly like minded people like ourselves, so a great social life if you want it. Some older people do the opposite in winter seasons and stay abroad, out of season for pennies with like minded people. Sadly for us we are back to school holidays due to our 9 year old grandchild so greatly restricted, thrust into being a parent again is quite a lesson in life.
Family is you greatest asset as we get older we need their support and safeguarding covering our backs. So the 'world is your oyster' but you have to put yourself out there, it won't come to you. Get out there and embrace it, it can be great fun, good luck!
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robjmckinney
BrianM
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BrianM
Last activity on 23/12/2024 at 00:18
Joined in 2015
49 comments posted | 21 in the Depression Forum
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I was "retired" at age 42 because of ill health and it was tough as we had a 3 year child. I can only suggest that you consider doing something that interests you and that you like. I hate people telling me to do some charity , as "charity begins at home" where we can help our own family first. By all means I help others as best I can but I try to help my wife, son and family first if I think they need me. I have my own health problems and I am on mediation, so I resent people telling me to do social or charity work because I am simply not able, as I can just about soldier on, as I am nearly 80 years this Nov. If people have a health problem they can hardly adequately do charity work, as they need first of all to put their own house in order, if they can. I think that " the blind cannot really lead the blind". Some people told me to join "men's sheds" etc but from what I see these people are competent at making or doing things and they do not welcome people who are lost and need help. In the end we all need a friend or two just for a chat and to share our cross with each other. I got counselling and I was told to just keep a low profile, as he felt other "healthy" people did not want me in their company and that is wise to just be aware how "lovely" most people really are.
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BrianM
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lacemaker
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lacemaker
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Last activity on 14/10/2024 at 22:02
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@BrianM
pre covid my husband ran a men’s shed and newcomers with no knowledge whatsoever were very welcome. I went myself and learned how to make things and really enjoyed it. I’m sorry you felt unwelcome when you tried.
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I take each day as it comes, try to have a focus for that day. Today is pretty good, but it gives me a nudge every now and again. H
See the best comment
mr chipps
AmbassadorLizzie when we loss loved ones some people are expecting to grieve in the same way with each bereavement, and are even more upset because they dont. this can be for many reasons, for example it could be the age of the loved one, how close you were to a certain person, how well they physically or emotionally knew a loved one. or lastly some of us may never have met a loved one for many reasons. or if physical events had taken place ,and a loved one could not be viewed by family and friends
this happened me was because, my son and i parted with bad blood between us, and when his baby daughter was born , and died age 50 minutes i was banned from attending her service or internment, her name was Rebecca Jade, but i called her Becky, and i bought her a small headstone and i go to her grave at least once a month with fresh flowers. i will always love my grandaughter, but possibly not as much as my Angel wife or son, who took his own life.?
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maury58
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maury58
Last activity on 17/07/2023 at 12:06
Joined in 2020
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Hello Carenity,
I am recently retired, which I thought would be great, I was looking forward to it for so long. You work your whole life to retire. But now that I'm here , I feel a bit depressed, surprisingly. I no longer feel like I have purpose. My kids are now grown, now my job is career is over. I almost feel a loss, like I don't know what to do my the rest of my time as I wait to eventually enter into eternal sleep.... Its a bit much. Anyone else?