Living with someone who has depression

Hi Phil, I first read your post this morning whilst having a sneaky peek on my phone whilst in work. I have spent a good 5 minutes trying to find it this afternoon before I go to work supporting adults with learning disabilities. Sorry to read about your wife. Mental illness really does effect everyone. 

I grew up with a brother who was mentally ill. My now ex of 30 years recently started showing signs of mental illness although looking back we used to put his 'conversations/actions' down to wanting attention. He confessed eventually to committing adultery which appeared to really tip him over the edge. He was diagnosed as being 'psychotic and delusional' His behaviour was really erratic at times but despite telling us all that he knew he was unwell ; his behaviour continued.

We as a family went above/beyond supporting him; even when I was arrested as a result of him sending vile emails to the person he was committing adultery with . Thank goodness the truth soon became apparent although he did turn up crying .He had done something similar to his best friend [letters ].

It tears you apart as a family ; it made me so ill that I contemplated suicide. That was the turning point for me. 

Do you know why your wife has so much anger? As having been on both sides of the depression fence' [my new partner suffered breakdowns due to his wife committing adultery, he lost his home, children /job along with being diagnosed with a terminal illness. He started self medicating on alcohol. He was arrested for drink driving after becoming suicidal. He has had spells in hospital. Talking for him was so hard as he didn't know how too.

As an onlooker patience is the hardest thing . If you have never suffered with depression then it is hard for you to know exactly all the emotions that your wife is feeling. It really is a long, dark, frightening place to be; no matter how loved you are. Logic/reasoning fly out of the window at these times.

Is your wife under a GP etc?

Talking along with medication is the way forward. Sadly until your wife acknowledges, accepts and embraces 100% all the help available along with an awful lot of self help then you all have a long road ahead as that point is when healing really begins.

 Here if you ever want support or just to vent.

Take care of yourself ;as you are important here in all of this .

Julie xx

My partner is a manic depressive and I myself have had several bouts of depression in my life. It can be very draining dealing with another person's issues and my partner can be very horrid when he has a crash. We have been together almost 17 years and it has been very tough going at times.

Is there anywhere you can go for some rest, a friend who can assist?

We are hear to support you as best we can.

Please take care of yourself.

I'm struggling with this currently. My husband and a few members of his family struggle with depression. I love him so much, but sometimes it can be hard to handle and I just want to snap him out of it, which of course I know isn't possible. No matter what I do or say, nothing seems to help him. I don't know what to do anymore. I just want to be there for him and get him through this. It's devastating. Is anyone else going through this with a loved one?

Hello all,

How are you doing? Have you seen this older discussion? 

Do you have any advice for living and supporting someone who has depression? Feel free to share here!
@blackpool66‍ @imnotok‍ @maury58‍ @sad_faery‍ @years931‍ @Watford‍ @Thumbznath‍ @Mummyof4‍ @ukjazzer‍ @janehidd‍ @PoppyFlux‍ @sodowninsurrey‍ @dundee63‍ @flower1971‍ @dogugu‍ @eloumol‍ @Charl1212‍ @Cruxxy‍ 

Take care,
Courtney