16 Years of Postnatal Depression
Published 9 Oct 2018
Sophiesmum has suffered from Postpartum Depression, also known as Postnatal Depression (PND), since her daughter was born 16 years ago. Her condition is still very present in her life today as she struggles with her daughter's forced adoption but she urges others to speak about their depression and not to hide it.
Hi, can you please introduce yourself in a few words?
I'm sophiesmum and I'm 35. I live with my fiancé of four and a half years in a town called Hartlepool.
Were you aware of postnatal depression before the diagnosis? Did you suffer from mental health problems before giving birth?
I was a happy, bubbly chatty lady before I became pregnant at 19. I was half way through the third year of my NVQ Retail Level 2 when I found out I was 3 months pregnant with my daughter, who has just turned 16.
How long after giving birth did you seek treatment for your condition?
It was around 2 months after I had given birth to my beautiful daughter.
What were your initial symptoms? How have these changed
over the sixteen years of your postnatal depression?
I would just sit and watch television, cry and I would snap at anyone for no reason.
My symptoms vary throughout the year, but they are worse at this time of the year.
Were your friends and family understanding of your condition? Have you gone to any support groups for suffers of postnatal depression?
It was my mum who realised that I may have PND, so she told me to make myself an appointment with my doctor as soon as I could.
I haven't been to any PND support groups as I don't know if there are any near where my fiancé and I live.
How has this condition impacted on your life and relationships? How did your PND affect your relationship to your daughter? Does it still have an impact to this day?
My fiancé is very understanding of my PND as I told him about it and I also explained what PND is to him as best as I could.
I wouldn't know how to tell my daughter about my PND as it took me ages to explain it to my fiancé. She does not know that I have PND as she was forcibly adopted back in the spring of 2003.
Yes, my PND still affects me today as I have never had counselling for it.
How do you think PND differs from more generalised depression?
I think that PND is different to more generalised depression as it can affect either parent. Plus it can also affect the relationship and bond between the parent who has PND and the baby.
Are you currently on any medication? How often do you see your doctor and are you satisfied with the care you are receiving?
I am taking 50mg of sertraline. I take one tablet a day every day. My medication used to make me sleep a lot at first, but now it doesn't affect my sleep.
I usually see my doctor every 6-12 months depending on if I can get an appointment with a doctor when I ring up for one.
Does your condition affect your ability to work? Are you working now?
I haven't worked in the last 16 years due to my PND and my daughter's forced adoption.
As for today, do you think therapy and medication have made you feel
better?
I have never had counselling for my postnatal depression even though I would like to.
I am still trying to find the right medication for myself as I have been on and off antidepressants for the past 16 years.
What words of advice do you have for other parents suffering from postnatal depression?
I would advise anyone who has PND to make an appointment with their doctor as soon as they can to check that they are on the right medication for themselves and to talk to anyone whether it is their doctor, family, friends or parents.
My mum once told me that "your family knows you better than anyone else". In other words, if a member of your family says that you are not yourself or they advise you to make an appointment with your doctor, then do it as they know you best.