looking for people who would understand being young and having RA

yeah being 20 is hard with RA I cannot do things like my friends. I have RA in near enough all my joints and my left arm is locked but they don't want to do surgery because of my age. I cannot party like my friends do because of RA and depression and it sucks, I never want to go out I am scared I will get hurt as in shopping areas people just smack my small joints especially my elbow and then think im pathetic for almost crying. I get funny looks because of how slow I walk and how I walk, I feel alone and the black sheep of my friends, supposed to go on holiday next year and do stuff like swim with dolphins but im scared my arm will make it impossible and so will my confidence