My dad past away from terminal lung cancer earlier this year

Hi everyone, I'm new here. I'm 36 and i live in Warrington, Cheshire with my fiancé and my family.

On the 14th of March this year my world came crasing down as my mum rang myself and my fiancé to let us know that my dad, who was only 63 had lost his brave, but short battle with terminal lung cancer.

I was heartbroken 💔. My wonderful fiancé comforted me as best as he could. 

When we came to Warrington (as we were living in hartlepool at the time) a couple of days before my dad's service (i said night night to my dad as i couldn't say tje other words) we wereet off the train by some of my family.

Both myself and my brother were really close to our dad as I'm a daddy's girl and my brother is a daddy's boy. Our two middle sisters were close to our dad as well, but they were mummy's girls. 

I am on antidepressants, which my gp had increased last October for me as my depression had gotten worse due to finding out about my dad. 

Myself and my fiancé were planning to come and spend my dad's last Christmas with him last year, but we didn't have enough money for us to get either the coach or a train to Warrington, but my mum had gone to my youngest sister's after she had finished work to see my youngest sister, sister in law and niece, but what i didn't know was that my dad was spending Christmas with my youngest sister, sister in law and niece until my mum surprised us by video calling my fiancé (i didn't have a phone at the time) so that we could see my dad and wish him a happy Christmas.