Things to ask in consultation

Hi, so very sorry to hear of your mum's diagnosis and wish you both well on this journey . My husband(74) of 43 years, was diagnosed back at begining of August with stage 3 oesphogeal cancer. His tumour is 5cm(at diagnosis) and bulky, so he has to have chemo to shrink it before he can have it surgically removed.  The nasal gastric tube, required for his liquid feed, had to be put in via endoscopy, which he sneezed out later the same day, only to have it replaced via scope following day. It remained in placed for nearly 3 weeks when it blocked.   Fortunately he was going on 3 days later for an exploratory laperoscopy and washout in preparation for big op to remove tumour and part of his stomach further down the line, so they replaced his feeding tube under general anaesthetic this time and so far its behaving. He hates having liquid feed but is unable to eat anything solid, including soft mushy foods.  He gets some reflux most days and feeling of pressure in the general area of the tumour. Fatigue is now becoming more obvious, and he tires very quickly. The thing he finds hardest though is not being able to eat properly. Unfortunately he also has a bowel to bladder fistula, which means it has to be removed and healed before he can start chemo.   While not ideal it is our only option, as tumour is too big to remove, and chemo would be too dangerous with a fistula due to infection and risk of Septicemia. So, he will be going into hospital at end of this month for a bowel resection, then home to recover before the start of Chemo. I'm struggling with it all a bit, especially as I am 63 and  have lots of medical probs, including complex Crohns, Rheumatoid arthritis and drug induced Lupus. I also have anxiety so I totally understand and sympathise with what you and your mum are going through. All I can advise is look after yourself, rest as much as you can when mum is resting, although not easy with a little one. Finally accept any offers of help you receive from family and friends, from babysitting, a listening ear over a cup of tea, that kind of thing.   It's the little things that really make a diffirence.   I am new here too, so sorry for long message. Stay strong and best wishes to you both. 💪💖Xx

No need to apologise at all. We can give each other strength and hope through this. He sounds like a fighter and all I can say back is please take your own advice on board too. Its always so easy to give and never easy to follow for yourself. You don't have to do any of this alone, take strength and positivity from any source you can get it from. Keep me updated and I wish him luck xx

Thank you so much AJC1992.. I agree we have each other on this journey and I'm so grateful for all the friendship and support I can get. I don't know how you and others feel, but I find I feel very alone at times, even when dealing with all the medical professionals. Anyway sending you and your mum best wishes, strength and positive vibes always. Keep me posted on your mum is doing and how you are feeling and coping as each appointment comes up. Good luck. Xx💕