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Social anxiety and depression in teens. How to help?
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robjmckinney
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robjmckinney
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What child does not have issues these days, certainly mine have issues ranging from self harm, drug abuse, mental health issues, sexual abuse etc. etc. Getting them to talk about it has always been an issue and getting help from the NHS a lost cause. Is there anyone in the family close to you daughter that may be able to get her to talk as parents sometimes are seen as the enemy or they don't want you to know they have made a mistake. Sadly today children seem to be glued to the 'online experiencies' rather than making direct friends. We were very worried about my daughter as she had no direct local friends, her whole life based online. It was not until we had some chats with friends that this seem to be a trend.
If you can gain some hint of her 'problem' there are some excellent groups on Facebook that can inform and share real experience of diverse problems. I must admit I found out to late of such groups and how useful they are, virtually every subject/issue is covered. I just had the delight of adopting our granddaughter through an SGO, the worst experience of our lives. Both parents have mental health problems, both tried to commit suicide, self harm etc. during the process. Social Services were terrible, lying in court, appalling dishonesty and no help anywhere. We won our case despite objections from Social Services the judge saw through their lies. But the point is, I found the Facebook groups with lots of similar experiencies of people all over the country, all to late but we were not alone. So my point is, try to identify her area of issues and look for a group with similar experiencies.
I had to section my son for a few days earlier this year but the NHS system is broken and discharging them quickly seems to be their intention. They now have him on various drugs and increasing strength, the Mother of our grandchild with serious mental issues where I supervise her on any contact, as directed by the courts. I have used various phycologists and therapists over many years and recent a therapist with our grandchild to check out our concerns, she was fantastic, no issues found thankfully. So there are various options for sourcing them online locally, therapists cheaper than phycologists. For the recent therapist, last year it was £55 a session and years ago phycologists triple or a lot more.
You may find it may be bullying of somekind and not more serious problems, talking is the best way to get a hint of the issue. Good luck!
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robjmckinney
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Polina.K
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Polina.K
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Last activity on 11/08/2023 at 12:02
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Hey @Evelynnn! How are you today?
Thank you very much for starting this discussion. I think the fact that you are trying to help and are aware of something being off is the first step to helping your daughter. I think it is important to create a safe environment for her to open up when she feels ready. I will ask other members and hopefully, we all can help your family.
@sophiesmum @anxietyisme @Alquimist @saalikkkk @nazza91 @lordvee @KleboldKlan @Arn_UK @Marv61 @lesmal @Pippadog @robjmckinney @whitecross1955 @BrianM @Tigger.co.uk @richard0804 @mjteddy @mr chipps @Sonicbear
Hey everyone! How is your day going?
How do you think @Evelynnn should approach this situation? What to do when you notice someone in your family getting depressed and socially anxious? How to express support without coming off as pushy?
Take care,
Polina from the Carenity team
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lesmal
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lesmal
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@Polina.K @Evelynnn Thank you for opening up this discussion. Your daughter at the age of 17 is also going through hormonal imbalances or issues at the same time, so please stick by her and find any help you can. Try and approach her, ask her if she wishes to discuss anything, speak to her doctor, find a therapist or make contact with any friends she might have. Hormonal issues can change one's way of thinking and life altogether; this could be a major reason also.
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Les
Evelynnn
Evelynnn
Last activity on 11/08/2023 at 09:38
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Hello @lesmal,
Thank you for your comment, it was very helpful! I talked to her about finding a therapist and she says she wants to do it, but she doesn't want any of her classmates or friends to know. I was thinking about asking her teachers if they have noticed anything odd but I don't want my daughter to feel like I am going behind her back? I guess we will start with therapy for now.
Rolandv111
Rolandv111
Last activity on 29/05/2023 at 18:40
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@Evelynnn Hi Evelynnn, know that you are a great mother for noticing changes in your daughter and putting all the efforts to get her back to normal. Go with the therapy. Everything will be fine.
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robjmckinney
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What child does not have issues these days, certainly mine have issues ranging from self harm, drug abuse, mental health issues, sexual abuse etc. etc. Getting them to talk about it has always been an issue and getting help from the NHS a lost cause. Is there anyone in the family close to you daughter that may be able to get her to talk as parents sometimes are seen as the enemy or they don't want you to know they have made a mistake. Sadly today children seem to be glued to the 'online experiencies' rather than making direct friends. We were very worried about my daughter as she had no direct local friends, her whole life based online. It was not until we had some chats with friends that this seem to be a trend.
If you can gain some hint of her 'problem' there are some excellent groups on Facebook that can inform and share real experience of diverse problems. I must admit I found out to late of such groups and how useful they are, virtually every subject/issue is covered. I just had the delight of adopting our granddaughter through an SGO, the worst experience of our lives. Both parents have mental health problems, both tried to commit suicide, self harm etc. during the process. Social Services were terrible, lying in court, appalling dishonesty and no help anywhere. We won our case despite objections from Social Services the judge saw through their lies. But the point is, I found the Facebook groups with lots of similar experiencies of people all over the country, all to late but we were not alone. So my point is, try to identify her area of issues and look for a group with similar experiencies.
I had to section my son for a few days earlier this year but the NHS system is broken and discharging them quickly seems to be their intention. They now have him on various drugs and increasing strength, the Mother of our grandchild with serious mental issues where I supervise her on any contact, as directed by the courts. I have used various phycologists and therapists over many years and recent a therapist with our grandchild to check out our concerns, she was fantastic, no issues found thankfully. So there are various options for sourcing them online locally, therapists cheaper than phycologists. For the recent therapist, last year it was £55 a session and years ago phycologists triple or a lot more.
You may find it may be bullying of somekind and not more serious problems, talking is the best way to get a hint of the issue. Good luck!
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robjmckinney
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Evelynnn
Evelynnn
Last activity on 11/08/2023 at 09:38
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@robjmckinney Hello,
I can't imagine how hard that must have been for your family. Let me know if you ever need to chat!
NHS has been the least empathetic organization, at least in my experience, unfortunately...
Thank you for your advice! My daughter agreed to look for a therapist. Which calmed down my nerves a little.
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Evelynnn
Evelynnn
Last activity on 11/08/2023 at 09:38
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Hi. My daughter is 17 and she has become very socially anxious and depressed. I don't know what caused it, if anything and she doesn't tell me. It happened very suddenly and it feels like she just changed. How can I help? I don't want to pressure her to open up to me, but if something bothers her, I want to be able to help. How do I approach this situation? Should I keep asking her if everything is ok or propose therapy or just let it be?