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Lost my love .......

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Stemosh

Edited on 01/01/2016 at 10:36

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Stemosh

Last activity on 15/03/2016 at 08:55

Joined in 2015

5 comments posted | 5 in the Depression Forum

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Hi everyone this is my first post on here and I don't really know what to do. I've had depression since I was 23 and I'm now 29. This is my second bout of major depression and I've been miles better for about a year mainly due to my girlfriend who has been by my side the entire way and I love her for it. however around August we found that she had to have minor brain surgery which went without a hitch but has left her pretty much bed ridden ever since. I've had no problem with this and took care of her as much as I could. However just after Christmas I relapsed very quickly and now feel awful. But the worst bit is My head keeping making me worry about our relationship "Why don't I feel like I love her" "why am i anxious about seeing her" "will we break up" and it's really upsetting me as I don't want to hurt her and I want to get the love back. Has anyone else experienced this???

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sophie2113

30/12/2015 at 12:13

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sophie2113

Last activity on 29/09/2016 at 10:55

Joined in 2015

13 comments posted | 8 in the Depression Forum

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Hi,

I'm sorry to hear you've relapsed. I think the feelings towards your girlfriend may be numbed by the depression, when I'm struggling I've often felt that I care about nothing and nobody although I wish that weren't true. My ex had Bipolar disorder and we slit up numerous times, always when he was feeling low. When he was happier again he realised the feelings were actually still there, so we always rekindled the relationship until my depression got worse and it was too much to handle.

I don't know if this is the case, just an idea though?

Lost my love ....... https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/depression/living-with-behavioural-disorders-mental-illne/lost-my-love-709 2015-12-30 12:13:00

sophie2113

Edited on 30/12/2015 at 12:15

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sophie2113

Last activity on 29/09/2016 at 10:55

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13 comments posted | 8 in the Depression Forum

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One time he said "I don't feel excited to see you anymore"

Lost my love ....... https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/depression/living-with-behavioural-disorders-mental-illne/lost-my-love-709 2015-12-30 12:13:19

Stemosh

01/01/2016 at 10:36

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Stemosh

Last activity on 15/03/2016 at 08:55

Joined in 2015

5 comments posted | 5 in the Depression Forum

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Thankyou sophie for the reply. I know it's the depression giving me these thoughts as when I'm calm I care for her deeply I just over analyse everything I do. For instance I woke up this morning facing away from her and because I didn't turn to look at her my brain told me I must think she's ugly. I know these thoughts are the illness I just pray I never act on them as I know I don't feel it right now but she is my world.

Lost my love ....... https://www.carenity.co.uk/forum/depression/living-with-behavioural-disorders-mental-illne/lost-my-love-709 2016-01-01 10:36:55

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16/07/2019 at 12:02

I take each day as it comes, try to have a focus for that day. Today is pretty good, but it gives me a nudge every now and again. H

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