Family disowned me and don't know what to do

Hi @Woodsta1986,

Sorry to hear about the way your family is treating you! I hope that you are not considering suicide as a way out, because it's not. If you wish to talk to someone over the phone about it, here is the number for the Samaritans, they are great, and talking to them can help you feel a little better: 116 123.

I hope you will get some feedback and support from other members here on Carenity!

If you need anything, just let me know.

Kind regards,

Margarita, your community manager.

It sounds strange. But cut them off, move and do not give them even phone numbers. They can follow you on facebook. Go and do your own things. Stop allowing people to hurt and abuse you. 

I don't know how old you are. I spent most of my life being abused by my family for being gay. After my parter of 24 years passed, I decided to take control. Moved thousands of miles. Started again. 

Hi. I can relate your you predicament. My two daughters have taken it upon themselves to disown me for reasons I can find unbelievable. One, telling the truth and second making bad decisions while I wasn't in a good place. Grief can cause you to make rash decisions and those decisions I am now paying an ultimate price for.

Background. I am divorced and remarried. My daughters I fear have been brainwashed by my ex-wife. They have only heard an extremely one-sided version of the divorce circumstances. I mentioned telling the truth, this goes back to 4 years ago when I had an argument with my youngest on Facebook where I let rip with 15 years pent-up divorce related frustration and told her a few home truths. I received a one word reply....EVIL. 

Families can be a fickle bunch when they take sides. I have a new family now and love them but it isn't the same kind of love that I have for my two daughters.

As 'Keith' has mentioned....move on, that is the only way forward. Now I am aware that can be difficult as I find, but it has to be attempted, in my case frustratingly. My problem with moving on is certain dates in the year...birthday's, father's day (which can fall on eldest's birthday) and Christmas. Christmas because you get 'family' rammed down your throat. That upsets me! To further make it difficult is my daughters only live 2 miles form me and have bumped into them and was totally blanked.

So if you can move on, they have the problem, not you and always remember that. 

Take care

Iain

Sounds like your family were suffering from a mental disorder themselves unfortunately.

Woodsta1986 I understand how you feel.  Most of my family is not talking to me. I have an brother here in England and wants nothing to do with me. But I do have my fiancè family. There's an saying you can pick your friends but not your family. Which is true.  You don't need them. They are the ones who are going to be sorry if anything did happen. There is someone who does love you considerably that is God and Jesus. I'm on Facebook pm any time Clare Ann Faulkner Smith. God bless and take care. Hopefully your new friend.

You have to learn that what they said to you was lies, evil lies.  You are loved deeply and as I have been through similar, I found a new family at a church and came to know God as my father and the people at church became my family that was 38 years ago and I am so happy with a family of my own and wonderful happy grandchildren that we love so much.  

Your parents must have real anger issues, and maybe some mental health issues, so forget them for now and concentrate on knowing you are loved and learn to love yourself you are the best person to learn how to love yourself.  I am always around if you need me or let me know the area where you live and maybe I will be able to get you some help.  No suicide thoughts because we all love you here, so respond to us when you are ready, and maybe we can get someone to counsel you when you are ready. Love and hugs from us all xx

I read so much from everyone that is so similar to my own situation. I have EU Personality Disorder. I am in the process of divorcing my husband after over 30 years marriage and four sons. Three of my sons do not speak to me, one is married and has a little boy who will be 4 in couple of weeks and they had triplet girls in April this year. I have not seen any of my grandchildren. They have one nana who is my daughter in law's mother, but I am nothing. I have never seen them, held them, felt their warm little bodies or heard their little baby sounds. They all live nearby, and the 3 sons have all walked right past me and ignored me. They block me on the phone, fb, I have sent cards and little notes but they are all ignored. I dread Christmas, mother's day, my birthday, their birthdays as I know they will be celebrating as a family along with my husband. And I am not involved. My heart aches, it is a real pain I feel. It makes me feel so isolated, and alone. I have sent Easter eggs to the children, little simple gifts, everything is rejected. I have to find something every single day to make me hold on to because I feel I am nothing, and if I wasn't here, it would be better for everyone. I love them so much, and would do anything to share in my boys and my grandchildren's lives, but I am not wanted. It makes me feel I am such a bad person. and it is a struggle to keep going. It is very hard living every day.

The word 'family' doesn't necessarily mean family has blood relations. You all know my issues from my previous posting. However, as mentioned by Clare73, family can come in the shape of God/Church. If that brings you happiness and contentment so be it. I have a new family through my second marriage to my wonderful wife. Don't get me wrong we have our differences in my case with one in particular but we survive. To return to alternative families I can mention a couple for me. One is through my local football I support, made many friends via Facebook and on occasions when I've been having a 'bad' day with my 'family' they all rally round in support. A great bunch. Another through my voluntary work I engage in, again these people will support anyone in the group having any issues. I could go on.

The bottomline is, you can pick or create your own family/friends who will support you and you likewise, support them. Yeah, the old saying you can pick friends but you can't pick you family is certainly bang on.

Take care all and if you ever want to speak just send a message or checkout my Facebook page and PM via that.

Stay strong!  

Sorry to hear this, when I was 18 my Mother opened the front door to the house, it was 10 O'clock at night and a Friday, she pointed at the door and said "get out" so in shock I grabbed a tent idnused as a kid and left, my crime was being Lesbain and telling her because I though it was right to be honest, I lost my entire family. I was and am not evil and neither are you, believe me they have the issues and need help from professionals! You need to do what I did, move on and build yourself a life without them, it hurts like hell and you will never forget them but you have to do this for you, if you don't I fear you will be subject to hurt and pain and games over and over again, make your own life and choose your own 'family'.. You can do this you know, cry a river get it all out and go... ❤️

I have not seen my children for 8 yrs. My ex cheated and blamed it all on me with lies. She couldnt control our children in fact my daughter she completely rejected at birth. She was uncontrollable. Manipulative and easily led. She got involved with a group of women who were all having affairs and encouraged her to do so. To leave she continuously picked fights and dragged up her previous affair of which i tried to forget. She had me atrested on false allegations of attempted murder to empty my business bank accounts and left me destroyed and angry. She poisoned our children blackmailed them with promises of cars n bikes. She demanded £1000 a week in CSA of which i couldnt pay as she had destroyed the business. When i met another women she went mad. Broke into our house and trashed it. Shes told my children i dont care or live them. When i sent presents. She had the police arrest me on more false allegations. She bribed the kids in court not to remember anything or they would be kicked out of home. Here i am destroyed. Attempted suicide 4 times and the medics save me. Why? I have no money. No life and no reason to carry on. Ive tried other relationships and all they want to do is use me and abuse me. My personal feeling is that most women are selfish. Arrogant. Vile and evil. Your nice n caring to them and they are just full of hate.

I dont want to live. I want to go to Switzerland and peacefully be put to sleep. Can anyone just help me end the horrible life x