How to maintain the mask...

When you have maintained these masks so well, and for so long. I have found that no one can recognize you in your Me mask.

The, Me mask is a personal relationship and needs TLC. So take good care of it while you wear your other masks until your ready to let your Me mask free 

Just wondering , isn't there a certain amount of vanity behind all these masks ? , the ' oh how do other people see me all the time ? ' . Just get on with your life , you can only be loved for who you are .

My mask slips alot, abit like other poster - when I was going for job interviews I could pretend to be anything (if I wasn't feeling emotional) but I had to think, oh dear I have passed the test, now I have to interact with these people, and the usual result is crying out of the place in tears, job centres don't understand, employers, who knows what they think, when they get a person they have judged to be a good fit for a job, they that person freaks out?  Job centre train people to con employers at the interview stage, not how to stay in employment imo.

Hi, first time,

like many of you I once wore a mask but recently thought what the hell and told everyone. Now, I am not going to pretend it was an easy decision to make, and after telling people was shall I  say a tad worried. However, for me it was about hitting the stigma attached to mental health full on and seeing the reaction. The support was really positive. However, I would say around the general public, strangers etc. I would still put on a huge fake smile even if I am dying inside, for me it's fairly normal and a part of who I am. 

Hello im new on here. Sometimes i think people go by what u look like i have always told people im not well its hard but then when i had my breakdown in march i had no mask left evrryone in my street and community new it has really affected me.. i have moved home and its been hard.. im very lonely as i cannot see my friends any more as i cannot be near cannabis and since ive been in hospital i just feel im better of alone so people dont have to put up with me i hate having this illness they say i cannot work and i do agree with them but im just surviving the life i once had feels so far from the one i have now my family say i should go out and do things but im still very paranoid since my breakdown.. i sound like a right sad case i have finally been diagnosed and apparently ive been on the wrong meds for nearly twenty years causing my manic behaviour.. iam now on quetiapine and diazepam it was working well but at the moment im suffering a depressive episode after my house move im trying to do things every day but quetiapine is very strong at 300 mg per night im feeling a bit lost and very alone im a single mum and its hard to keep it all together for my children any advice would be greatly appreciated right now thankyou for listening to me..:)

I still find the need to hide behind a mask, Not many people know the true me and I just wish I could let the mask drop and attack the stigma attached to mental health issues.

Hi guys

Not been on for a while, my apologies. 

It seems a lot of us battle to keep the mask on. I think we are all agreed it is far from easy. I had a colossal breakdown a few years ago and once finally through it I began to try to create a mask I could glue on. 

Like most, I found work to be almost impossible and, much like you Ursula, resigned myself to being essentially housebound due to paranoia, anxiety, flashbacks etc etc etc etc etc 

One thing I did was watch a lot of movies and eventually it occurred to me that the people on the screen were not the real people at all. They wore masks just like us. 

It didn't help me with employment, so I decided I needed to create an environment where I could simply act. I started my own business. A shop. Now this may seem horrific to some and I never would have seen me in that role. However, I created the environment, I call the shots, I decided on my character for that situation. 

I now live a weird double life, where my internal battles continue and my time at home is full of anguish, self loathing and despair, but as soon as I walk through the door at work it's like someone shouts "action". I am a completely different character in my shop. I could perhaps win an Oscar one day! 

Obviously everyone is different, just thought I would share my tactic. It's flawed and of course there are times it doesn't quite work out. Like any actor, you do sometimes make a crap film...

I do know one thing though, I don't think I could pull it off if I hadn't created and control the environment I perform in. 

Best of luck all, I hope everyone finds some form of stability. 

Mark

I have never been able to control my feelings and have cried most days for many years, only recently I started a new med which has stabilised my mood. It wasnt till recently a new psychiatrist tried this. I have tried many meds for depression and anxiety its so debillatating. My daughter died at 19 and I have had other tragic events so I have had stress most of my life. I would burst into tears in front of anyone. I felt so self conscious. This is the first time in many years I have tried a mood stabiliser and it is working, thank goodness.

Thankyou mark thats really interesting i too have been wondering about starting a buisness . Sometimes a do wonder if a breakdown is a breakthrough. After so many years of my illness i think my little body just couldnt take any more.. the mood stabilizer defo helps but if anyone has any more ideas of other meds that may help my recovery i would greatly appreciate any feedback thanks for your comments they are greatly appreciated ..dunrunin it may help you to look up how to calm down the amigdala in the brain in a way u hijack the brain to feel more calm than panic.. unfortunately i have ptsd through trauma i have tried this method and find it really useful when we have repeated trauma our body releases quortisole and we get the fight or flight response if the trauma is repeated many times our amigdala stays in panic mode which when we were cave men was very useful but in this day and age we dont need to be in this permanent state of panic with adrenaline realeasing into our bodies so much . By recoding the amigdala we can calm down the release of adrenaline there for we are then no longer in a state of pure anxiety.. this has really helped me and i hope that it helps u to . Iam truly sorry for your loss of your child i think you are very strong and maybe you should be proud of yourself however hard.. hope this is helpful and wishing you all better mental health in the future i find this site really helps me to feel less isolated thankyou..

I've given up trying to maintain my mask. I don't think I have long left though so it probably doesn't matter.