How to support a loved one with a mental illness?
Published 9 Oct 2018 • By Louise Bollecker
How to support a loved one with a mental illness?
This year, World Mental Health Day 2018 takes place on the 10th of October and will focus particularly on mental health during childhood and adolescence. For this occasion, we should all make efforts to try to understand our loved ones who are suffering from mental illnesses, as well as discussing ways to help them.
Preventable disorders from an early age
Did you know that half of mental disorders appear before the age of 14? Yet, in the majority of cases, they go unnoticed. It is therefore essential for families to listen to children and adolescents. It's about giving them the right tools or, in the words of the World Health Organization (WHO), to help them build the capacity for mental resilience.
Preserving the mental health of adolescents and young adults is paramount when we know that suicide is the second leading cause of death among 15-29 year olds. Adolescents face many challenges; from physical changes to life changes (such as the end of high school and a possible move from home). The harmful use of alcohol and illicit substances, as well as eating disorders, also affects young people.
Finally, the WHO has identified two other issues for 2018 that have a profound impact on the mental health of young people: addictive online technologies and the involvement of young people in humanitarian emergencies (conflicts, natural disasters, epidemics ...).
Talking about mental disorders is essential
The most important aspect of fighting against mental disorders, is to acknowledge the problem and try to talk about it. Many people that are suffering mentally are also in denial or trying to hide how badly that they are feeling. The first warning signs and symptoms of mental disorders should be noticed and above all, verbalised. Patients should not feel alone in their mental battles. In most cases, that do not require medical treatment, talking about the problem is already a step in the right direction. Speaking positively and praise any progress or good moments they have within their illness. If possible, accompany your loved to their medical appointments so that they don’t feel alone in their illness.
The important thing is to break the isolation that people with mental disorders feel. If one of your loved ones decides to confide in you, you must try to listen to it without judgement. The awareness that a loved one is concerned is a big step, even if it is sometimes difficult. It is necessary to put aside guilt, sadness, disappointment, anger…
Helping a patient: Am I up to it? How to react?
You too can experience difficult emotions, especially if your loved one accuses you, rejects you or ignores you. While trying to understand and help, do not forget about your own mental health. If necessary, get help so that you do not become overwhelmed by psychological distress. Talk about them to a separate friend or family member who will support you. Accept the idea that you may not be able to help your loved one as you would have wanted and that we all make mistakes.
Finally, you are a close friend of the patient, not his doctor. It is up to a health professional to take the necessary steps to improve, or even heal, your loved one.
Mental Health Contacts
Anxiety UK
Charity providing support if you've been diagnosed with an anxiety condition.
Phone: 03444 775 774 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 5.30pm)
Website: www.anxietyuk.org.uk
Bipolar UK
A charity helping people living with manic depression or bipolar disorder.
Website: www.bipolaruk.org.uk
CALM
CALM is the Campaign Against Living Miserably, for men aged 15 to 35.
Phone: 0800 58 58 58 (daily, 5pm to midnight)
Website: www.thecalmzone.net
Depression Alliance
Charity for sufferers of depression. Has a network of self-help groups.
Website: www.depressionalliance.org
Men's Health Forum
24/7 stress support for men by text, chat and email.
Website: www.menshealthforum.org.uk
Mental Health Foundation
Provides information and support for anyone with mental health problems or learning disabilities.
Website: www.mentalhealth.org.uk
Mind
Promotes the views and needs of people with mental health problems.
Phone: 0300 123 3393 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 6pm)
Website: www.mind.org.uk
No Panic
Voluntary charity offering support for sufferers of panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Offers a course to help overcome your phobia/OCD. Includes a helpline.
Phone: 0844 967 4848 (daily, 10am to 10pm)
Website: www.nopanic.org.uk
OCD Action
Support for people with OCD. Includes information on treatment and online resources.
Phone: 0845 390 6232 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 5pm)
Website: www.ocdaction.org.uk
OCD UK
A charity run by people with OCD, for people with OCD. Includes facts, news and treatments.
Phone: 0845 120 3778 (Mon to Fri, 9am to 5pm)
Website: www.ocduk.org
PAPYRUS
Young suicide prevention society.
Phone: HOPElineUK 0800 068 4141 (Mon to Fri,10am to 5pm & 7 to 10pm. Weekends 2 to 5pm)
Website: www.papyrus-uk.org
Rethink Mental Illness
Support and advice for people living with mental illness.
Phone: 0300 5000 927 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 4pm)
Website: www.rethink.org
Samaritans
Confidential support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair.
Phone: 116 123 (free 24-hour helpline)
Website: www.samaritans.org.uk
SANE
Emotional support, information and guidance for people affected by mental illness, their families and carers.
SANEline: 0300 304 7000 (daily, 4.30 to 10.30pm)
Textcare: comfort and care via text message, sent when the person needs it most: http://www.sane.org.uk/textcare
Website: www.sane.org.uk/support
YoungMinds
Information on child and adolescent mental health. Services for parents and professionals.
Phone: Parents' helpline 0808 802 5544 (Mon to Fri, 9.30am to 4pm)
Website: www.youngminds.org.uk
NSPCC
Children's charity dedicated to ending child abuse and child cruelty.
Phone: 0800 1111 for Childline for children (24-hour helpline)
0808 800 5000 for adults concerned about a child (24-hour helpline)
Website: www.nspcc.org.uk
Refuge
Advice on dealing with domestic violence.
Phone: 0808 2000 247 (24-hour helpline)
Website: www.refuge.org.uk
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8 comments
@slousa You're very welcome, I hope this helps you :)
Nice one Josephine.
I hope you are well? Ready for Christmas yet?? I am...hee hee. Should I say that my Wendy is??
A few years ago a very dear friend of mine suffered from 'Panic Attacks'. At first I thought that she was after attention and I am ashamed to say that I didn't take too much notice at first. Time went on and she wouldn't go out shopping for groceries or anything. I researched the condition on the internet and was absolutely amazed at the number of websites dedicated to this condition. I read and read about panic attacks and how they are 'caused', apparently it is due to a chemical imbalance in the brain? There are many many treatments, 'you pays yer money and takes yer choice' type of thing, because there are so many 'trains of thought' on how to treat someone.
I spent weeks no months just sitting with her and her little boy, and sometimes her husband, who I knew from the fishing club we belonged to. We talked about anything and everything over and over until I could predict what she was going to say next. If her husband or sometime's me took her to the GP for treatment she would say a mile down the road that she couldn't do it, she couldn't go to the GP she had to go home. So home we went.
After about three months I managed to get her to venture outside the house and have a walk around the small 'Green' opposite their house. Every day I would suggest walking a bit further and so that's how we all went on. Hubby was at work most of the daylight hours of the day so I would go round and keep getting her out and walking, after a couple of weeks I managed to get her to walk around the block with her son and I. The nights started to get lighter and hubby was able to take her for a walk a couple of times a week, when he couldn't I did.
And so we went on, until eventually I got her into the car and drove her to the GP surgery. After a check over she came out with some pills, one per day to start and then it went to one 'whenever she was going to be where people were'. She still some five years on has the occasional panic attack when she goes to the shops, but thankfully the days of not going out have gone, she lives a near normal life with hubby and son. I am much closer to the family now, after the time that I spent with them, we are indeed all good friends.
I am so glad that I took the time to research the condition and the possible treatments available.
Warmest Regards. Happy Christmas L&BW's Richard, Wendy xx and little Toby, woof,woof.
